Dear Friends,
In the Christmas classic, It’s a Wonderful Life, George Bailey’s guardian angel asks, “What‘s the matter with him, is he sick?” Gabriel answers, “Worse, he’s discouraged.” I grew up thinking that was a ridiculous line. Discouragement? Nothing serious; just shake it off. Nothing could be further from the truth.
I battled serious discouragement in the past two weeks. The physical effects of the radiation treatments have just started to kick in, but I’m a spiritual train wreck. Discouragement literally means “a lack of courage or confidence,” and it pops into my daily routine as a vague sense of futility walking hand in hand with my sorrow. Unlike despair, my discouragement does not knock me out, but like these daily reatments, it pummels me with body hits to weaken my spirit. It whispers lies to me.
“Your best days are gone forever; nothing you do has meaning; you’re chasing the wind” (Ecclesiastes 2:17). I feel God moving away from me, and I ask, Why are you leaving me? Why are you so far away? Why aren’t you helping me? (Psalm 22:1,11) I’m calling on your name everyday and
nothing happens (Psalm 22:2). Don’t hide from, Lord, or leave me alone (Psalm 27:9).
Hopelessness creeps into my soul and sows a foul crop of “what ifs” in the fertile soil of my thoughts. What if the radiation fails? What if the cancer in my lungs spreads? What if I can’t work and lose my insurance? What if Gayle is widowed? What if my children are fatherless? Misery drains my strength (Psalm 31:10), and I want to quit.
I decide to scour the psalms for answers, to claim God’s promise in Psalm 9:10, “If I search for Him, he will not abandon me.” I realize it all begins with praise. Like a child, I return to the most elementary of lessons. If I know God’s name, I will trust in Him (Psalm 9:10). While commuting to the hospital, while wearing that suffocating mask, while watching those hopeless eyes being wheeled in and out of the waiting room, while wiping back tears at the sight of bald children, I praise God.
I praise God’s omnipotence.
His power is beyond human imagination.
He created the vast heavens and precious earth (Nehemiah 9:6).
He created me (Psalm 139:13).
He owns me and all of creation (Psalm 50:12).
Each breathe I take is a gift from the Lord (Isaiah 42:5), and the breath of every human is in his hands (Job 12:10).
Only El Shaddai’s great power can rescue and shield me (Psalm 33:20). Armies and great strength failed ancient kings and warriors (Psalm 33:16); in the end, modern medicine will not save me.
But despite my great need, the omnipotent Creator cares about my distress (Psalm 31:7), and at this moment,
He is thinking about helping me (Psalm 40:17).
I praise God’s omnipresence.
As surely as He sees everyone on the planet (Psalm 33:13-14),
He watches me as I sleep in safety (Psalm 3:5), and
He walks with me in every hospital room (Psalm 139: 7-12).
When technicians strap that mask across my face and flee the room, El Olam, the God of eternity, stands by my side (Psalm 16:8).
He stood by my mother at my birth and ordained every moment in my life (Psalm 139:16).
God stands with me in my past watching my birth into sin (Psalm 51:5) and washing me clean from evil and guilt (Psalm 31:2).
Jehovah stands with me in my future carrying me forever in His endless arms (Psalm 28:9) and sweeping away all my sorrow and pain (Revelation 21:4).
I praise God for His faithfulness and unending love.
His promises to me are as pure as silver (Psalm 12:8).
He will answer my prayers (Psalm 17:6).
He will restore my health in this world or the next (Psalm 30:2).
God’s goodness is great, and He has unimaginable blessings stored up for me (Psalm 31:19).
His unfailing love for me and my family stretches far beyond the heavens (Psalm 36:5), and He will be my guide until my dying day (Psalm 48:14).
If I live, He will care for us; if I die, He will care for them.
My praise for God unearthed the deep roots of my discouragement.
My soul sees what my mind cannot. Like a precarious financial portfolio, my hope is scattered among permanent and temporary investments; some are secure; many are high risk. Praise puts me in touch with the invisible but permanent qualities of God in my life (Romans 1:20). Much of my hope and trust is in the eternal but not all. My greatest hope is in God, but I also trust in doctors and treatments, fitness and healthy lifestyle, life insurance and equity.
My soul realizes the futility of hoping in the temporary. My courage fails me when I hope in the things I will lose- earthly health, money, job, achievements, and homes. Hope in the temporary swings open the door of my spirit and discouragement marches in. What I can see will one day vanish; the invisible lasts forever. The psalmists use solid metaphors to impress upon us the permanence of the eternal. God is our rock, our fortress, our shield (Psalm 18: 1-3).
Only the Lord is my inheritance and cup of blessing (Psalm 16:5). All my hope must rest in Him (Psalm 39:7). His unfailing love will envelop me because He is my only hope Psalm 33:22). My Redeemer must be my sole refuge, my only desire (Psalm 142:5). All day long, I will place my hope in Him (Psalm 25:5), and He will chart His perfect plan for my life (Psalm 138:8).
As I praise Him for His attributes and thank Him for the infinite goodness He has poured over me, I realize that though my body and soul are withering away (Psalm 31:9), He guides me along the best path for my life (Psalm 32:8). He is worthy of my complete and blind trust (Psalm 33:4).
Dear friends, if we take courage or contentment in the things of this world, discouragement and discontent lie in wait. Let us lift our vision and gaze on the realities of heaven where our real lives are hidden (Colossians 3:1-4), and God’s peace will fill us here on earth replacing the vaporous peace offered by this world (John 14: 27).
God bless,
Tim
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