Celebrating or Wallowing: my choice

October 20th. Thank you for praying for me. It's our wedding anniversary and I am home alone this evening. But praise God I am not wallowing in my grief. Many are praying for me, I am actively resisting the Devil and praising God and I know that through the healing the Lord has brought to my life I am in a stronger position than this time last year.

I did not buy a card or flowers this year. Probably should have. But I feel close to my honey anyway. I've talked to the Lord and I have talked to Jackie this evening.

I've celebrated positively this anniversary. I've actually enjoyed our house this evening and I have been worshipping the Lord and crying over what God is doing even in the last few days in and through Paulette and Gayle. I felt I was able to share these joys with Jackie. I could tell you their stories but thwse are theirs to tell.

Anniversaries, other special occasions and holidays all bring the person who has lost a loved one an opportunity and a choice: either indulge the flesh, wallow in grief and feel sorry for yourself or move forward by pursuing physical and spiritual objectives and feel good enough to celebrate the good memories.

It is absolutely critical that I keep pursuing healthy nutritional choices, weight loss, strength training and overall fitness. And even more important that “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:14). When I live this way, I experience healing, hopefulness and energy. And by God's grace, this I do.

Maybe next year I'll not only celebrate but will also buy some flowers and a card.